The sickness will never go away

I feel like I'm stuck in a horrible stephen king novel. the hep c was bad but I managed it. The treatment is like going to hell and back but I managed it. Now I should be well and I'm having interferon and riba flashbacks. I tried to lower my anti ds and today had a meltdown. The pain tonight was so bad. I didn't want to take a hot bath but its after two in the morning and I needed relief to sleep. I took pain pill, sleep aid, tylenol, and its like nothing. I think I'll just make a story out of this. Part fiction , part non-fiction about a disease that won't go away. Society lives with it. Society doesn't know about it. The human race is getting sick with hcv and they won't know it till the liver is partly damaged. They are told by doctors the tx has some flu like symtoms....thats all. Oh I would like every doctor to have those flu like symptoms. If I every get the flu again, it will be a cake walk.
I've had a amazing couple of years. Married a fraud, narricist, adulter, sex addict. I loved who I thought he was. Has money stolen from me by him and his children. They are like a band of theives. Then waited till some of this was over and dove right into tx. I thought tx would be over. The pharmaceutical company says it should be over. Of course they lie or no one would take their drugs. More like poisen. So I'm tring to get the poisen out of me. It takes awhile. I'm sure every new cell made during tx, during the six months is full of the posien. Maybe when they die and reproduce new ones I'll get well. If I'm not, I may turn into a grouchy old lady that tells kids to get off my lawn. I'm on anti ds. I call them fat pills since they make you fat. Only people that take them know this as the pharmaceutical companies hide this fact. They will tell you that you gain because you eat more from not being depressed. I'm on a starvation diet and I finally began to lose when I lowed my dose. I had a meltdown with a crying and rage fit so I uped the dose of the fat pills once again.
Sorry. I must be more positive or I'll scare everyone off from taking pegasys tx. The good news is it should get better in a year. I've heard that from others that took tx. I believe them over the doctors any day.
Going to sleep now before the hot bath wears off. It took the edge of my pain so hopefully I'll fall asleep.
Goodnite world.